Living a Positive Life

Posted on 17th May, 2015

I'm always striving to live a life with a positive mind and outlook but this hasn't been an easy task and still doesn't always come naturally. Getting to this point has taken many years of "re-training" my attitude, and acknowledging the benefits of dealing with lifes obstacles in a positive manner. 

Life wasn't always a bed of roses and for a long period was filled with huge dark clouds of low self-esteem, eating issues, depression, anxiety and panic attacks, continuously worrying to the point of making myself sick at times and had barely any confidence. I used to be a shadow of the person I am now, with a fabulous "cover" of being the life and soul of the party, the joker who made everyone laugh ... it was all a sharade as well as wishful thinking. I kind of wanted to be that person, wanted to be popular surrounded by people and a busy social calendar so I made it happen, but not necessarily in a positive way. The song "Tears of a Clown" used to ring so true "Oh yeah baby, now if I appear to be carefree
                                                        It's only to camouflage my sadness
                                                        In order to shield my pride I try
                                                        To cover this hurt with a show of gladness"
                                                        Smokey Robinson - The Tears Of A Clown Lyrics | MetroLyrics 

Now, after many years of changes, transformations and a roller-coaster ride of emotions, I can honestly say I am truly happy. No longer a party girl, more selective of who I let in to my life and more honest with my emotions, my focus is positive in the most part. Certainly there are times dark clouds attempt to waft through my life still, but using my personal mantra "acknowledge, accept and release" helps me to deal with these situations .... acknowledge the situation rather than bury your head in the sand, accept "it is what it is" and that life happens! and then release the negative emotions attached to it, deal with it and let it all go! 

The process of changing my life has been very deep, complicated and painful but there are simple steps we can all take to help ourselves. Firstly, and most importantly, we need to want change to come our way because change can be fear inducing, Often our pain is our comfort blanket and the thought of letting it go and finding our true self can be so very daunting and scary! Dont' be afraid, the benefits are innumerable and eventually you will be thanking yourself! 

Some small steps, that when added together create massive changes!

1. Be honest! 
With yourself! You need to admit to yourself that change is needed. This can be the hardest part but once you see there is a need for an improvement to yourself and your life, you have then stepped onto the road to self healing. 

2. Support

There are many different avenues of support, the first being someone close you can trust - a family member, a close friend, maybe someone else you know who has changed their life, but speaking to someone about how you truly feel, being honest with them (after being honest with yourself) helps to vocalise your thought and creates a reality. If you really feel there is no-one around you to talk to there are many wonderful organisations out there that can and will listen - professional organisations, voluntary services, local therapists and healers and each one will be able to guide you to the most suitable service for you. 

3. Positive thinking
Realise that positive thinking and how we react to situations is a choice. There is always time before a reaction to stop, focus and consider how to react to this situation. Choices create results! 

4. Be grateful and appreciative

We may not always have everything we "want", but we mostly have everything we need. Being appreciative of what we do have will manifest into abundance. Every night, before I go to sleep, I ALWAYS say thank you for something that might have happened during my day, no matter how much I might have to rummage to find it, or how small the moment was. 

5. Live in the present moment

It's very true that living in the "now" will reduce inner pain and anxiety. Nothing can change the past, it's happened and is behind us, what does happen though are the emotions can stay with us and cause havoc to the future if we allow them to. Worrying about the future will also have the same effect, we can predict what will happen in the next hour, next day or next week .. it will unfold as it's meant to. 

Again, it is down to our own choices and choosing to focus our minds on the prestent moment will help the positive thinking become dominant. Today is the day that matters and in the bigger scheme of things it's 24 hours to be positive in! Once today has gone, it's in the past and can be ticked off as a positive day! 

6. Turn your thinking around

Focus on what you want instead of what you don't want. 

See the positives instead of the negatives in situations. 

Wake up everyday and take a deep breath in, appreciate that you have a blank canvas of 24hrs ahead of you, and that it will be a fantastic, rewarding day and you will smile your way through it. Start the day as you mean to go :) 

7. Like attracts like 

Remember, the more positive you are the more positive things that will happen in your life. You will find positive people will spend time with you, the negative ones that bring you down will drift away. Every positive thought, will create a positive action, which will create a positive thought .. it's a cycle and once the wheel begins to turn it's harder to stop! 

8. Exercise, therapy and "me-time" 

Find an exercise you enjoy, whether it's walking, cycling or more exhilerating such as swimming or the gym. Endorphins are released which trigger positive feelings in the brain, resulting in the "feel-good factor". Exercising also helps take your mind off "stuff" giving you a break from the negative thoughts. 

Martial arts, Tai Chi, Yoga are all wonderful because they will also include focus on the breath, mindfulness and peace which are so beneficial to positive living. 

There are many complementary therapies on offer that will assist you on your journey of change ... healing, crystals, hypnosis, massage, life coaching, NLP, EFT .. the list is endless but you may find one that suits you and your needs. Talk to friends, see if they visit anyone, word of mouth is the best recommendations. 

Medtiation is an amazing tool to learn .. joining a group to learn techniques that you can then use yourself at home will really help with the healing you are going through. 
Enjoy some "Me-time" whether that's walks in nature, pottering in the garden, reading, long bubble baths, whatever it is that you can find some peace and time for yourself with. 

Implementing some or all of these steps to Living a Positive Life will quickly show results, and the sooner you see results, the more positive you will feel! 

Positive cycle